You cleaned your what?...Why?

In a continuing effort to amaze my non-Jewish readers, I am going to discuss the most stressful event of the Jewish Year, Passover. Why is this holiday so stressful? you would think Yom Kippur would be the stressful one, not eating or drinking, 5 prayer services in 24 hours, your last chance to get in good with the higher power for the year...but no. It's the cleaning for Passover (Pesach in Hebrew) that nearly does in every Jewish woman, and many Jewish men, every year.
Let me explain what has to be done. Everything you own must be gone through, cleaned and/or gotten rid of if it contains Chametz (any of the 5 grains or their derivatives, like grain alchohol, citric acid, etc.). Pasta, unopened bags of flour, most medicines, and a whole host of other things must be used up or thrown out or possibly ritually "sold" to a non-Jew for the duration of the holiday. All your dishes, utensils, pots, pans, and appliances must be cleaned thouroughly and put away in sealed cupboards. every surface in your entire home must be wiped down with caustic cleanser (bleach works well) including under the beds, Under the Washer and dryer, under the refrigerator and stove, on top of the fridge, etc. All books taken from bookshelves and shelves wiped down (I found 6 cheerios and a ton of crumbs on our bookshelves this year). Strollers cleaned out, high chair completely cleaned, the list goes on and on. after everything you own is perfectly clean, you go into your kitchen and really get down to work. All counter tops have boiling water poured over them, all cabinets are wiped out, your sink gets really boiled and bleached, your stove and oven treated by torch to burn away any remaining chametz after cleaning them. If you can, you torch your pots to make them perfectly clean of chametz, although many people just have a Passover set of dishes, utensils, and pots. then you cover everything in heavy-duty foil (heaver than anything I've ever seen in a regular grocery store, like tin-pan heavy) until it feels like you're cooking in a space ship. Buy new dish drainers, sponges, and other kitchen accoutrements (if it's touched hot food during the year, it must be replaced for Passover) then you're ready to start cooking for Passover, which is it's own challenge. But that's another post...
Just so you can see, here is what a passover kitchen might look like (not my kitchen, but a good example)

On going back to America

Life as an ex-pat isn't easy. In fact, it's darn hard a lot of the time. Don't get the wrong idea, I love living in Israel, am glad we emigrated here and are raising our Kid(s) here, but sometimes you simply long for the familiar. Like Wal-mart, Target, Safeway (or any real grocery store), Starbucks, etc. And it's hard to be separated from all of your family. Most people who move here have at least some family, but we really have none, and it's been an uphill battle to build a support system here. I still don't have a good babysitter in walking distance. My best option just got engaged, so she's off in la-la land for a while.
But we are going back to the US for a visit in one week. I'm going a bit berserk thinking about traveling in my 3rd trimester with a one year old (Thank G-d the Rabbi is coming!) but I'm really excited just to be "home" with my family for a while. I know it's just a different set of difficulties in America (no kosher meat, or Jewish Milk, having to drive again, instead of walk everywhere, etc.) but at least I will be dealing with people in my native language (and hopefully theirs). And everything is so cheap there (except Jewish stuff, which is very cheap here) that we will be testing the limits of our suitcase allowance with shoes, clothes, Ziplock bags, crystal light, sponges, kitchen knives, high-threadcount sheets (220 is really high here), and anything else I can think of that is really expensive or unobtainable in Israel, but cheap in the US. In exchange I will be bringing Olives, Pomegranate products, Za'atar (Israeli spice), scarves, etc. for family and friends.
So, here's to the exchange of consumer goods, but also to the joy of having 4 generations living on the farm again (however briefly), my daughter being charming to all our friends, getting to feel my BFF's baby kick her tummy, because it will probably be a while until I get to meet him in person, hugging my other BFF because she's going through a tough time and Skype just doesn't cut it, watching my parents play with my daughter, their first grandchild, going as a family to the aquarium for the first time, and everything else. Oh, and if you believe in Prayer, think of us as we drive across the country in Early January with our one-year-old who's longest car trip to date has been 2 hours. Yeah, we're nuts.

I know it's been a long time...

...But I've been busy. We had to move. not out of Jerusalem, but to a different part. And then there was Passover. that took up a LOT of time. And I have a 6-month-old. In case you didn't know, they are the biggest time-suck ever. More than the internet, blogging, and wii combined! (not that I have a wii, I've just heard and I really want one. Too bad we don't have a TV) Oh, and I run 2 businesses, one sewing, and one making balloons. And I was in Ulpan (Hebrew Language school) but then I quit because I was becoming a maniac and pulling out my hair, and I decided something had to go, and it WASN'T going to be the kid (although it is tempting). But who could get rid of such a cutie, right?
So I quit Ulpan, we moved and my life has calmed down a bit. I'm even sewing for fun sometimes. Now there's a novelty!